Four-month update

After you become a widow, life is divided by the moment you lost your spouse. I find myself describing events as before Dave died and after Dave died. Today marks four months. 

Even though the stretch of time between meltdowns is lengthening, I still cry every single day. The pain is incrementally changing from intense to a dull ache. But then sometimes the intensity comes back in full force and it feels like I’m right back to where I was in the first weeks.

I am grateful my kids and grandchildren are close by. We all feel it in different ways. My daughter told me that after her dad died, her eyes were open to the number of people who walk around daily with the deep grief of losing their loved one. You don’t know until you know.

On a positive note, I am getting a roommate. A woman from church is coming to stay with me while she looks for a house to buy. She is recently divorced. We sense God arranging our meeting and feel like it is going to be mutually beneficial as we both heal. I have struggled living in this very quiet too-big house alone and am happy for the company. Bonus is she is bringing her puppy, Rizzo! He is an adorable Multipoo. I’ve been looking to get a dog so am happy to have his company too.

Tomorrow is Easter when we celebrate Jesus’ resurrection. I rejoice for Dave that he is in His embrace and is only experiencing joy. I look forward to the day I will join him.

John 11:25-26: Jesus said: I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?

I believe.

How cute is this guy?!